I Am So Wicked

I just have to share this with you...I have been (again) a VBG (Very Bad Girl).

I was counseling one of my clients today, a very mature high school student of almost 17 years of age. One of his complaints was that his older sister had been terribly and unusually irritating this summer when she's home from college. Always correcting him, like a "Mom", and treating him like a much younger person. I was sympathetic, of course. "My, I said", "And when she's home for grad school just as you're going to the local Junior College it will be even worse. You'll have two years of that." It was his turn to be silent for a moment, and then he volunteered the information that his summer film school teacher had said that Cal State at Northridge had a very fine film department. I congratulated him on his find.

The back story on this is that he hadn't been doing well enough in high school to even consider applying to UCLA's film school, or any other prestigious school. And he hadn't been doing anything with his summers except playing video games. I had put his Mom up to volunteer him at a local nonprofit, a done deal and cancelled only if he was enrolled in a summer class. How perfect that a film class was available at just the same time his volunteer work would have started. And, I had covertly incited his older sister to treat him like a little kid so that he'd come up with a college plan. Because his current plan had been to swan along at JC and stay home for another couple of years. His sister and I had put our heads together about what exact behavior would irritate him the most. I am a firm believer that some people are motivated only by pain avoidance. And I am perfectly willing to apply pain.

So, there, a little Machiavellian but it worked. Now I need to come up with a covert plan so that his older sister will apply to Stanford for Grad school. She's perfectly eligible, but she has a crisis in confidence. He needs the stick, she's more of a carrot personality. I am asking around, to see if anyone I know has a cute son attending there.

Yes, I know, so controlling and manipulative. I've counseled these kids since grade school. I take their success in life very seriously. And, I have an edge, in that I'm not their parent .Most of all, my methods work. An unmotivated student took a college course in film during his summer break. He's doing quite well in this course. And he found an alternative to both University and Junior College. I believe that the most important factor here is that he supplied the answers. I simply applied a bit of motivation. Now I need to come up with a way to illustrate to him (without giving my hand away) that his primary motivation is pain avoidance. I'd like to bring his awareness to this so that he decides to add another string to his bow and self motivate because he wants success. That is always the most difficult challenge. And (rubbing her hands in wicked glee) I do so enjoy a challenge.